About Postponement
Abstinence means to refrain from sexual contact of any sort including genital
intercourse, oral sex, and anal sex. Although there are some types of sexual
activity that could not result in pregnancy, they are still a form of sex.
Postponing sex means THAT two people in a relationship make a mutual decision
in their current relationship to NOT have sex or to put sex "on hold." Past
sexual decisions do not matter as anyone can choose to postpone sex at any point
in their lifetime.
Why choose postponing sex?
People choose to abstain from sex or postpone sex for a variety of
reasons, one of which may be to be 100% safe in preventing the transmission of
sexually transmitted infections, including
HIV. However, if someone chooses to postpone sex and this person was
previously sexually active, he/she should seek testing to understand their
sexual health status. The Villanova Student Health Center provides testing for
all sexually transmitted infections including HIV. Please call (610)519-4070 to schedule
an appointment. All tests are available at a low cost and are confidential.
Intimacy
Some people use sex to express their affection, however, sexual expression
does not have to include intercourse. By expressing yourself in ways that do not
include intercourse you may be able to find more important, romantic, and
creative ways to display your feelings and be intimate with a partner. Sex does
not always lead to a deeper relationship with someone and in fact can at times
be destructive to your relationship. A “no” to sexual activity can also be a
“yes” to deeper communication and mutual appreciation. You can still abstain or
decide to postpone sexual activity with your partner even if you have already
had sex.
101 Ways to Make Love Without Doing It at Villanova
- go get coffee at Starbucks
- email each other
- text message each other
- talk on IM
- call each other on the phone
- take a walk along the
Schuylkill River
- go see a movie
- go for a bike ride
- go out to dinner
- watch TV together
- go to a Villanova sports event
- go to the Jersey Shore
- study together in Bartley
- go to a party
- hang out with friends
- make dinner together
- go see a play
- go to the Philadelphia Zoo
- go for a boat ride on a lake
- go on a
dinner cruise
- go swimming in Butler Annex
- relax in a hot tub
- go
jogging together
- go rollerblading
- go ice skating
- go
fishing
- take the train to somewhere you haven’t been before
- visit family members together
- read to one another
- hug each other
- kiss
- hold hands
- hold one another
- lend a listening ear
- write each other love notes
- send each other cards online
- order Campus Corner
- hang out at the Oreo
- visit the bookstore
- watch MTV
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- go to Falvey library
- go to
religious service together
- go to the King of Prussia Mall
- laugh together
- cry during movies
- read each others’ horoscopes
- eat by candlelight
- feed each other grapes
- cuddle close with hot chocolate
- talk about your feelings
- go to Connelly Center
- go to Minella’s Diner
- watch the sunset together
- eat together on campus
- go for a long drive
- lay in the grass together
- share an ice cream at Hope’s
- take a walk along a creek
- go to a concert at the
Wachovia Center
- play in the snow
- play Twister
- paint together
- enjoy Cappuccino together at Holy Grounds
- go bungee jumping
- go water skiing
- feed each other chocolate
- go dancing
- make a CD of your favorite songs
- watch Saturday morning cartoons
- smile
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- read a novel together
- do laundry together
- tell them you love them
- leave a rose on their car
- bake them cookies
- give each other butterfly kisses
- go to a drive-in movie
- window shop at Suburban Square
- compliment them
- go to NYC
for the day
- do Yoga together
- take a class together
- snuggle
- enjoy South Street together
- check out a
museum
- go to the outlets in Lancaster
- take care of each other when you are sick
- nibble on their ear
- look at baby pictures
- surprise them with a present
- study in the library together
- put a personal in the Villanovan
- run in the rain
- take dance lessons together
- make chocolate fondue
- give them a piggyback ride
- put your perfume on their pillow
- run up the steps of the
Art Museum
- lay out on
Sheehan beach together
- buy a gift
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It is important to remember that both partners in a relationship must
verbally consent to having sex, or for that matter, any type of intimate
relationship. Consent is the active giving of permission to take a particular
action. Consent can only be given when both parties are free to act. To learn
more about consent, healthy relationships, and sexual assault, visit our
Sexual Assault Webpage
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